1. I was so bored with the yuppies at my college that senior year i wrapped my hand, stage makeup-ed a black eye on my face and went to the bars. i told the yuppies i got in a fight over chicken wings at a bar on the edge of town.
2. i used to escape parties in college and go on my own down streets. i would enter a strange party and speak in a British accent.
3. i drank bartles and james wine coolers in college until i discovered gin.
4. i threatened to quit college 2 months before graduation. i had a job waiting for me, one that provided a car, but didn’t see what the point was. very benjamin braddock. my grandfather said he would give me 500.00 to stick it out.
5. my grandfather died the night before my graduation.
6. my favorite outfit in college was an old band uniform jacket and a pair of jeans.
7. my friends and i once brought strawberry daiquiris and a guy who didn’t even belong to an economics class of 300 people. of course that was the only day the professor noticed i existed.
8. i still eat ramen noodle soup.
9. i used a self correcting typewriter in college. you kids are so fucking lucky.
10. i started doing improv in college and i have used that way more in life than my marketing degree.